a week from now

ill be in my dorm on newton campus in cushing hall at boston college. i will have met 50 kids also in the emerging leader program im in. i probably will be at this moment packing a bag with sneakers and active clothes for a retreat at a camp at the cape that im going on the next two days with those fifty kids. i wouldnt have seen my roomie yet because im moving in a night earlier than the rest of the freshmen. ill probably be looking around at the still partially unpacked boxes and clutter in my too-small dorm and mapping out in my head how i will organize my space without it looking like a color-coordinated trash bucket. i'll probably be calling my mom. i'll probably be texting about four people about how my first day on campus went, how moving in went, how meeting new kids went.maybe ill even be hanging out with some other kids that also moved in early, maybe meet some kids who will be my good friends in the long run, or some single-serving friends just to get myself out there.

in one week i wont be in worcester. i wont be three minutes from my best friends. i wont be under the same roof as my family, including moxie. i will be on my own, in boston.

i tihnk ive been freaking out a little bit. maybe someone mentioned how ive been freaking out. i jsut need to get all of this out before i explode. i have a bunch of carroll school of management work due friday. this work consists of five chapters in one book, three chapters in another, and a lengthy article, all about commerce, business, globalization, and equally enthralling subject matters, on top of two essays that count toward my grade in one class. ive so far read one five chapters in the first book. thats all. i need to finish really bad.
i also have to finish about a hundred pages in a novel the entire bc freshman class was assigned to read before arriving to school.
i also need to make another trip to a target or store of equal merit to pick up about 15 more incidentals on my never ending college-dorm shopping list.
i have been spending an ungodly amount of money on everything. it sucks. from toiletries to storage to clothes to computer necessities, my debit card is wearing thin.
i need to say bye to my friends. i jsut said bye to adrieanna tonight, one of my best friends. one of the first of my bests i had to say bye to. i also said bye to cat the other night at chewy's farewell cookout. and to some others that i refuse to allow myself believe i will not see in a while.
i need to pack. ive been going through my clothes and picking out what i will and wont bring. i need to make another cut. its like my articles of clothing are trying out for the bc fashion club or something adn some dont make the cut. my clothes will not all fit in my dorm. it sucks.
i need to recruit a few people to help me move in. im moving in a day early so i think there wont be many people helping carry stuff. and im in a residence hall with no elevator i think. and on the third floor. with a lot of stuff. like a fridge, for example.

last but not least... i need to stop worrying. someone just told me to stop. i guess its true. i will be fine. i will get my school work done, i always do. i will make time for my friends, and they will be here when i get back and i will keep in contact,.. i'm only 40 minutes away. i will get everything i need and i will not go broke. i will move in problem free and i will be happy.

but its only natural to worry.
i'll just try to keep it to a minimum.


i should be ecstatic, anywho. i mean come on.. i'm going to BC :o)
in ONE WEEK!